Live Joy

  This week feels a little more personal. As a lifelong athlete, I’ve always loved the hustle. I love having a goal. I love pushing myself to see what I’m capable of. That mindset has served me in so many ways but one thing I’ve had to learn the hard way in midlife is this: our bodies don’t respond the same way they used to. For example, my coach gave me a goal of 12,000 steps a day. Simple enough, right? But if you’re anything like me, your brain immediately says… if 12,000 is good, then 15,000 must be better. That’s how I’ve always operated, do a little more, push a little harder, go the extra mile. But what I didn’t realize is that I was actually doing more harm than good. My body wasn’t interpreting that extra effort as “dedication” it was interpreting it as stress. My cortisol levels were elevated, inflammation was creeping in, and instead of supporting my goals, I was working against them. Now, I’m on a strict 10,000–12,000 steps per day. And I’ll be honest… some day...

I didn’t expect to be writing this. But if you are a parent with a child in youth sports it’s worth reading what some clubs are doing! But after the last several months, I have to share it because this isn’t just about soccer anymore. It’s about fairness. It’s about kids. And it’s about a system that, somewhere along the way, lost sight of both. My son has played club soccer for the same organization for six years, Southern Indiana United (SIU). Six years of commitment. Six years of showing up. Six years of believing in the process. And while our other son, who also plays for SIU, has had stability (three coaches in six years, same teammates, consistent development)… My other son’s experience has been the complete opposite. In those same six years? Eleven different coaches. Players constantly leaving. No consistency. No real development structure. But we stayed. Why? Because we were told a new coach was coming in someone we knew, respected, and believed would ...

  If you grew up in the 80s and 90s like I did, you know exactly what I’m about to say. Skinny was everything. We were told to eat as little as possible, do hours of cardio, and avoid lifting weights because we might “look like a man.” Every magazine, every celebrity, every model reinforced the same message, smaller was better, thinner was the goal. And whether we realized it or not, so many of us spent years chasing that. Then things started to shift. We moved into a body positivity era where the focus became more about confidence, acceptance, and overall health. It felt like we were finally stepping away from the pressure to be as small as possible. But lately, I can’t help but notice that we are quickly starting to slide back. “Thin is in” again, and I’m going to say this as clearly as I can, we cannot do this again. Midlife changes everything. What worked in your 20s does not work the same way after 40. Hormones shift, muscle mass naturally declines, and bone density starts...

  A few weeks ago, I was talking to one of my favorite people on this planet. We’ve been friends for almost 39 years. She is one of the most brilliant women I know… and also one of the most anxious and nervous. We were talking about her daughter’s soccer trip. Their flight was delayed which, as we all know, means no sleep, a long weekend, and a lot of unknowns. And just like that… she went down the rabbit hole. “She’s not going to play well in her games now.” “She’s going to be exhausted when she gets home Sunday.” “She has a test this week—she’s not going to do well.” “This is going to be a disaster.” And I just paused for a second and asked her… “Does it really matter if she fails a test in 6th grade?” “Does it matter if she doesn’t have her best game?” “Will any of this matter a year from now… or even a month from now?” And of course… the answer is no. But this is the reality for so many people. It used to be my reality too. We take a small moment… and...

“You are not stuck. You are scared. Stuck means no options. Scared means uncomfortable options. You have choices. They're just hard choices. Own that. Then make one. The door isn't locked… you're just not ready to walk through it yet.”   I came across this quote recently and it stopped me for a moment because it speaks directly to something many of us experience at different times in our lives. We often tell ourselves that we are stuck. We say we're stuck in a job we don't love, stuck in habits we wish we could change, stuck in our health journey, or stuck in a routine that no longer feels aligned with the life we want to  live .   But when we pause and really examine the situation, most of the time we are not truly stuck. Being stuck would mean there are no options at all. In reality, what we often face are choices that feel uncomfortable, uncertain, or difficult to make. Those choices require change, and change naturally brings fear.   Growth almost always require...

Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about where we spend our energy. It feels like the world today pushes us toward extremes. On one side, we’re told that nothing should bother us. Don’t react. Don’t care. Don’t worry about anything. Just ignore it all and move on. On the other side, we’re told the exact opposite. That we should react to everything. Stand up for every issue. Argue every point. Fight every battle. Social media especially seems to magnify these extremes. It can make it feel like you have to choose one side or the other. But real life isn’t meant to be lived in extremes. There has to be balance. The truth is, not everything in life is worth your reaction or your energy. There are so many things we simply have no control over. Spending our time worrying about them, arguing about them, or carrying them around in our minds doesn’t benefit us in any meaningful way. But and this is an important but some things absolutely are worth our energy. Some things are worth s...