Build the Body You Love: Part 1 – It Starts in the Kitchen

If you're in your 40s or beyond, you've probably realized something frustrating: what worked in your 20s doesn't work anymore. Your hormones are changing, sleep isn't as restorative, your body feels different, and your brain feels different. Hello, brain fog (or what I lovingly call menopause brain). Yet somehow, we expect our bodies to respond the same way they did twenty years ago. We slash calories, spend an hour on the treadmill, take another fitness class, and wonder why the scale refuses to budge. The truth is, midlife requires a different strategy.

And honestly? That realization can be hard. Not only do you have to change how you eat and how you exercise, but you also have to accept that healthy, sustainable progress simply takes longer than it did before. We live in a world of instant gratification where everyone promises quick results, but building a healthy body for the long term doesn't happen overnight.

I want you to ask yourself one simple question: What is your real goal? Is it fitting into a bathing suit for one vacation, or is it being able to walk upstairs without getting winded, squat down to use the bathroom without pain, tie your shoes comfortably, travel, and play with your grandchildren—or even your great-grandchildren—well into your 80s? That's the body I'm building, and it's the body I want for you. Longevity is so much more important than a number on the scale.

There is so much I want to share on this topic that I've decided to make it into a series. This week we're talking about nutrition because, in my opinion, you can't outwork a poor diet. Next week I'll share how I've completely changed my workouts, why I stopped relying on endless cardio, and what finally started working for me.

Let's start with something that almost no one enjoys hearing: you need to track your food. I know, I could practically see everyone's eyes roll. But here's my question: if you don't know what you're eating, how do you know what needs to change? Tracking isn't about guilt or perfection. It's about awareness. Download MyFitnessPal (or another app you like), buy an inexpensive food scale, and commit to learning what you're actually eating. Not for two weeks or thirty days, but for an entire year….yes I said a year.  You're building habits that will last for the rest of your life, not trying to survive another crash diet. 

One of the biggest mistakes I see women making is eating far too little. Many of us have spent years believing that 1,200 calories was the magic number. We wonder why we're exhausted, constantly hungry, struggling to build muscle, and frustrated that the scale barely moves. Before your body is ready to lose fat efficiently, it first needs consistency. That's why I recommend finding your maintenance calories before ever trying to diet. 

You can calculate your maintenance calories at www.macronutrientcalculator.org. Even if your goal is to lose weight, I encourage you to spend three to four months consistently eating at maintenance. Think of it as rebuilding your foundation before trying to renovate the house. Your body needs to trust that it is being fueled consistently before asking it to perform well in a calorie deficit. 

So, what exactly are macros? Macros are the three nutrients that provide your body with calories: protein, carbohydrates, and fat. Protein provides 4 calories per gram and is essential for building and repairing muscle. Carbohydrates also provide 4 calories per gram and are your body's preferred source of energy. Fat provides 9 calories per gram and plays a critical role in hormone production, brain health, and helping your body absorb important vitamins. 

Let's use an example. Imagine a 150-pound woman who exercises three to four days each week. Her maintenance calories will likely fall somewhere between 1,800 and 2,000 calories per day, although everyone's needs are different. I recommend aiming for approximately your body weight in grams of protein. In this example, that would be about 150 grams of protein daily. Focus primarily on whole-food protein sources like chicken, turkey, eggs, lean beef, fish, Greek yogurt, and cottage cheese. Protein shakes are perfectly fine too, especially when life gets busy. 

About 40% of your calories can come from carbohydrates, and please don't be afraid of them. Carbohydrates are not the enemy. Fruits, vegetables, sweet potatoes, white potatoes, beans, rice, and oatmeal all provide your body with the fuel it needs to perform well during workouts and throughout your day. Around 30% of your calories should come from healthy fats such as avocados, olive oil, nuts, seeds, and natural nut butters. Healthy fats become even more important during midlife because they support hormone health. 

The goal is to eat as much whole food as possible. I know a lot of people start eating packaged food once they start tracking because it’s “easier” remember we are not doing this for easy we are doing this for our long-term health, weigh out your apple, banana, chicken etc. One trick is to eat the same breakfast, lunch, and snack every day, find a breakfast you love and a lunch you love and that takes out all the guess work out of most of  your meals. 

I'll share exactly what worked for me. Before I ever tried to lose weight, I spent five months consistently eating 1,900 calories every single day. I focused on building good habits, hitting my protein goal, and fueling my body properly. Only after those five months did I reduce my calories by about 500 per day. I stayed in that calorie deficit for sixteen weeks until I reached the weight where I feel my healthiest and strongest. 

Throughout the process, I also had my hormones checked multiple times and used DEXA scans to make sure I was losing body fat instead of muscle. Now that I've reached my goal, I'm slowly increasing my calories again by adding about 100 calories each week. Week one was 1,500 calories a day, week two was 1,600 a day, week three was 1,700, and I'll continue increasing until I'm back at maintenance. This process, often called reverse dieting, allows me to maintain my results while continuing to fuel my body appropriately. 

The biggest lesson I've learned through all of this is that the goal isn't to eat as little as possible. The goal is to nourish your body so it stays healthy, strong, and capable for decades to come. Building the body you love isn't about punishment, it's about giving your body what it needs to thrive. 

Next week we'll dive into workouts. I'll share why strength training became the foundation of my fitness routine, how I structure my week, why Zone 2 cardio and interval training have replaced endless cardio sessions, and how shifting my focus from burning calories to building strength completely changed my results. 

If you have questions about maintenance calories, macros, or where to start, send me a message. I'd love to help you build a body that doesn't just look good today, but continues serving you well for the next 40 or 50 years.