Redefining Enough: Letting Go of the Invisible Measuring Stick

 


For as long as I can remember, I’ve carried this underlying feeling of not being enough. And it’s hard to explain because it’s not rooted in comparison—I don’t look at others and wish I were more like them. It’s deeper than that. It’s an internal feeling of not enough as a mom, friend, sister, daughter, or partner. A quiet but persistent voice that whispers, you should be doing more, being more.

In many ways, this feeling has shaped who I am today. It’s made me a goal-setter, a problem-solver, and someone who thrives on productivity and control. And while those traits have helped me achieve a lot, they’ve also stolen moments of joy—because no matter what I accomplish, that nagging voice still lingers, telling me it’s not enough.

Lately, I’ve been sitting with this feeling instead of pushing past it. I’ve made 2025 my year of introspection, and the same two questions keep surfacing: What is enough? And enough for who?

I believe that when a thought keeps resurfacing, it’s a sign to pay attention. So, I started journaling—writing down my thoughts, my fears, and all the ways this belief has shaped my life. And what I’m realizing is this: my definition of enough has never actually come from me. It has always been something outside of me—a reflection of what I thought others expected, or the stories I created when someone’s words or actions made me feel like I was falling short. It’s an invisible measuring stick that keeps moving, no matter how much I achieve or give.

But what if enough isn’t something to chase? What if it’s something we decide? The truth is, if we tie our sense of worth to what we think others want from us, we’ll always be running toward a standard that can never truly be met. Enough isn’t something we earn—it’s a choice we make. It’s deciding, in this moment, that we are already whole, worthy, and complete. That doesn’t mean we stop growing or striving for more, but it does mean we stop measuring our value by impossible standards. It means we give ourselves permission to exist without needing to prove our worth. Because the truth is, we were always enough—we just have to believe it.

If you’ve ever felt this way, I encourage you to ask yourself the same questions:
What is enough to me?
Who am I trying to be enough for?

Maybe the answer will surprise you. Maybe it will set you free. Either way, I know this—you are already enough, right now, exactly as you are.

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