Not Every Mother’s Day Feels Like a Celebration

 


This Mother’s Day Was Hard—And That’s Okay

As I reflect on this Mother’s Day, I’ve realized it was the hardest one yet. Not because of one big moment, but because of a quiet, persistent feeling that I couldn’t shake.

I know the script we’re supposed to follow: that being a mom is enough, that bringing our kids to soccer games and doing the day-to-day work of motherhood is all we should need to feel fulfilled. And in many ways, I am deeply grateful for those things. But this year has been a season of reflection for me, and I’m trying to pay attention to my feelings instead of brushing them aside.

This Mother’s Day started at 6:30 AM with a cup of coffee and a quiet moment of gratitude. By 7:00, I was up making breakfast, getting the kids ready, and rushing to the soccer field by 8:15. After the game, there was the grocery store, walking the dog, picking up a few things, squeezing in a bit of downtime, and then a two-hour drive to another game. We grabbed a quick bite on the way home and walked in the door at 8:40 PM. And when I looked back at the day, it felt like any other Sunday. There was nothing different about it. I didn’t feel seen. I didn’t feel celebrated. I didn’t feel like it was my day at all.

I found myself waiting for something, anything, that would make the day feel special. And the waiting only made it harder because deep down, I think I knew it wasn’t coming.

I’m not writing this to ask for pity or sympathy. I’m writing it because I know I’m not the only one who feels this way. And I don’t think we should feel ashamed of it.

Mothers are often expected to pour into others without asking for anything in return. We’re taught that feeling unappreciated or wanting to be acknowledged somehow means we’re ungrateful or selfish. But I don’t believe that’s true. It’s not selfish to want to feel loved. It’s not selfish to want to feel valued.

It’s also not wrong to feel sadness on a day that’s supposed to be about joy. Yes, we’re lucky to have our children. And yes, there are mothers who are grieving, those who’ve lost children, lost their own mothers, or are still hoping to become moms. But that doesn’t mean your feelings aren’t valid. Pain and gratitude can live side by side. Your experience doesn’t need to be compared to anyone else’s in order to matter.

So, if you felt invisible this Mother’s Day, if it passed without acknowledgment, if you felt a little more alone than you expected, you’re not the only one. You’re allowed to feel what you feel. And maybe just saying that out loud is enough for now.

 


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